NETFLIX = LIFE CONSUMING EVIL

So guys, I am so sorry that I already broke my promise about writing every Monday and Friday. But... you see... I was... Netflixing

I watched the entire series of How I Met Your Mother and I'm starting Breaking Bad and ... It's just all too much! I'm addicted. I'm so addicted that sometimes I dread making plans with loved ones because all I want to do is stay home in my PJs, make some nachos and watch an entire series or bing on movie marathons.

But is it a problem?

I truly don't think so.

Even though I Netflix a ton, I still have my jobs, I spend time with my friends and family, I get my creative work complete and I read novels. So looking at this I don't think I have a netflixing problem. 

I'm not going to make any promises for my posting schedules anymore... but expect one from me once a week at least... or not... we'll see how my netflixing goes.

With love,

Lisa Alves

PS Netflix is the best thing that anyone has ever invented. 

Sex vs. Making Love - The Battle of Hook Up Culture

So I saw this post on my tumblr:

“It’s simple to have sex. People do it regularly. In cars, in apartments, back alleys, drunk, sober, high, it’s easy to just take your clothes off and have sex with the person standing next to you. Making love however, is more than that. It’s opening yourself up to someone. It’s standing in front of them, as they peel away all your layers and you’re asking them if they’ll have you and keep you safe. Think of yourself as an envelope, you’re sealed most the time, so whose important enough to read the letter inside? Because that letter is full of your thoughts, fears and dreams. That’s what being naked really is. That’s what it feels like to be exposed. Don’t just give that away. Wait for the person whose going to read that letter, and never want to stop reading it.”

And I could not agree with this more than I do right at this moment.

Maybe it's because hookup culture disgusts me. 
Maybe it's not my thing.
Maybe it's because I'm a hopeless romantic.

Whatever the reason is to why I agree with this statement I found on the ever popular, Tumblr, it rings true for me and I'm finding it really hard for anyone to feel the same way about it. I see a lot of people my age hooking up and being fine that they will probably never speak to that person again for what ever reason they may have, but i just sit back and ask myself, 'how?'.

Just having sex with a stranger, or a person you met online puts anyone in a pretty vulnerable situation. The foundation of it is, you're naked in front of someone who doesn't know you and you don't know them. That's the area where I'm like... I kind of want to know who I'm taking my shirt off for. BUT I TOTALLY GET WHY PEOPLE DO IT. People have a rush sensation of sharing an intimate moment with a stranger. That's just not my cup of tea. 

Then there's the whole friends with benefits. I don't go kissing my my friends or frolic in their bedrooms naked with them, male or female, despite what people might think. YES, I understand that THIS situation calls for a person that you have come to know over time and care and respect on some level, but it's not love you're expressing when you're having sex with your friend, it's just satisfying a pleasure that all of us crave. BUT...

THIS IS WHERE MY PROBLEM WITH HOOKING UP COMES INTO PLAY. When you have sex with anyone, stranger, friend, significant other, chemicals are released in your brain to the body telling you that it feels good, and in reaction the new chemicals in your brain are released, feeling attachment and love towards the other person, because they are making you feel good. But when you can't call or see the person who made you feel good, because the societal rules of hooking up say you can't or you have to wait because you don't want to seem needy or clingy, you become sad, angry, frustrated, annoyed, and/or anxious.  

These chemicals that nobody has any control over travel through anyone who has sex. This is how feelings develop and how hearts get broken in hook up culture. In this culture, people can't communicate freely, the way they want. 

THIS IS WHY I AM SO FRUSTRATED. I like going with what I feel, I've learned that in theatre school; follow impulses, listen to my gut. So when someone I like is around or takes me on a date or maybe even kisses me, these chemicals start releasing their way throughout my system and I want to spend time with this person because they make me feel good. Then my emotions start kicking in and I want to communicate to them how much like them and I want to spend my time with them... BUT I CAN'T. 

Some people who hook up with others are use to satisfying their pleasurable cravings and then being let down, it's an easy roller coaster ride for them. Some are cool about it and don't care most of the time so it's just a walk through the park. But there are some people out there who don't see it as a walk through the park or even as a simple roller coaster, it's a terrifying plane ride where the pilot is no where on board the flight. 

Hook up culture has created a huge stigma towards sharing feelings with one another. It was already unnerving to let someone know that you liked them before sex was even part of the equation, because even if your are not having sex with the person you like, it is always part of the equation; it's expected, assumed, anticipated, wondered, etc. But because it is and people can be more physically intimate with one another during these modern days, more chemicals are running through everyone's body and everyone is getting annoyed, frustrated, sad, etc.

Now some people love this culture; great! keep doing what you're doing, but just be aware that what you're doing is causing people to become frustrated. I'm in no way trying to condemn the actions of people, I'm simply just stating what I get from this hook up culture.

But for people like me who are having these chemicals running rampant, they're affecting gut decisions and impulses. There is nothing more relieving than communicating feelings that have built up over time. It's relieving just communicating what each individual wants, and actually being honest about what it is each wants... because its a waste of time and doesn't serve a purpose if someone just says what they think the other person wants to hear, or worse, trying to convince oneself to do something they don't want. 

I think what modern technology has done to sex is wonderful. It's liberated women's sexuality and made sex safe for people around with world with contraceptives galore. But I'm not speaking on that.

Why I say 'HOLLA' to that comment I found on Tumblr is because sex at its base line is boring, its either just to procreate or to satisfy ones primal need to get off. But when you add the affected gut impulses and emotion to sex it becomes exciting and scary and wonderful. It's also not selfish anymore, its about the other person too. You can't just give your enveloped self for a stranger to open or a friend to peruse, it's just lame. 

I like letting my heart go and saying what I feel, even though half the time I am hesitant and scared about the outcome, I do it anyway. And even though I'll think about what I had just done months later, I don't regret what these chemicals in my body made me do. 

I don't like locking up feelings and what I have to say to please people or worrying that I'm letting an opportunity pass me by. I want someone that I admire, that I'm attracted to, to open my letter and in return open theirs.

Again, maybe it's because hookup culture disgusts me. 
Maybe it's not my thing.
Maybe it's because I'm a hopeless romantic.

But in my world, what I'm going to do is wait for the person who wants to read my letter and who never wants to stop reading it. And it's ok for other people who want that too. Hook up culture is definitely not for everyone. 

With (whole hearted, true emotion, not hiding it) love,

Lisa Alves

Check out my tumblr ---> http://laalvezz.tumblr.com/

Second Year of Theatre School

I haven't written in such a long time because... Theatre School.

Now my last post was last May which was about the time I finished up my first year of theatre school. My first year of training was coming to an end and I was feeling good about the work I had created with my ensemble, but it was summer!!!!

I saw so much theatre, I worked a ton of hours at silly part time jobs, and I went to London, England with my best friend Jessica Goddard. So Summer 2013 treated me very well.

By the Autumn I started my journey in the dark tunnel of second year at Humber College's Theatre Performance program. I wrote in my journals throughout the year how it was not a dark tunnel and how the faculty should stop referring to second year like that because it was such a negative image... BUT SECOND YEAR WAS A DARK TUNNEL.

It was so dark, sometimes I didn't think I even existed or would make it to the exit. We just did so much through the semester, I'm surprise nobody evaporated from exhaustion. We trained in the studio to find the play with our vocal technique and electrify our dynamic alignment, physically.

But besides the training we stared workshopping pieces. We worked with:
Nancy Palk on The Machinal
Kelly McEvenue on The Beaux Stratagem
Alex McLean and Marissa Zinni on Orestia
Kennedy C. MacKinnon and Thomas Hauff on Twelfth Night and A Comedie of Errors
Marie Beath Badian on The Fight.

So yeah... we were basically working on an entire season as if we were part of a professional theatre company. But this is why I love my training at Humber, its practical. Its so similar to what to expect in the real world, from rehearsing classic shows from Shakespeare or Contemporary Dramas or devising as a collect collaborative.

Now that its summer and a full year has cycled through I am so happy to be moving on into my Third Year at Humber. Next year will be stressful and informative and fun, but before September arrives theres a lot that needs to be worked on and I've never been as excited to read, research, train and observe as I am right now.

This summer is going to be different then last. For instance I said goodbye to Walmart last summer and now I'm currently a Barista at Starbucks. I am also continuing my teaching at StageCoach and will be playing Mary Poppins alongside my beautiful head teacher and my rugrats. And this year, I'm excited to be part of Theatre Relay's project.

Its a collective collaboration among 8 artists who have each created solo work to be performed by another artist in the company. I'll post more information about it later, but this work is something that excites me and I'm so stoked to be part of.

And although I am not going to London, England with Jessica, or anywhere exciting this summer, I'm still seeing theatre across southern Ontario; venturing to Shaw and Startford to see some great productions and I'll also be digging through Fringe, Summerworks and Luminato to see some new works.

So I'm back and I'll be writing every Monday and Friday on various topics including Theatre, Music, Movies, Travel, Community and anything any of my followers may want to read.

With love,

Lisa Alves